To You, My New Commenter

Mom2nji,

I know that the post two days ago was the first time you have come across my blog. How do I know this? I have posted numerous times about my cesarean, and my daughter’s NICU stay, and my many views on cesareans and VBACs.

Now, I am not angry at you. It may seem like it, but I never deleted your comments. You did. I have a big group of great followers and they stood up for me better than I could have done myself.

It wasn’t the cesarean that put my daughter into a NICU or made her bruised. It was everything leading to the cesarean. The frank breech, the fetal tests, the version, and then ultimately the emergency cesarean. All in all, the cesarean is what I remember the most. It is the summary of that awful day when I thought I knew what was going on with my care. When I thought I was doing the best thing for my baby. A NICU stay and an unnecessary incision definitely cured me of that.

Because of this one uninformed and uneducated choice, I have an incision in my abdomen. I may never be able to have a vaginal birth. You say that you don’t want women to feel “a csection somehow robs a mother of “birthing”.” and I completely agree. But sometimes, it does. You might be perfectly content with your cesareans and that is fantastic. Most women aren’t. They are unnatural. God didn’t create such fouled bodies that 1 in 3 women need to have their children surgically removed. I don’t think the God I know would do that.

I am so glad you were grateful and happy for your cesareans and I am so glad that you don’t have pain and were able to walk and hold your babies right away. So very glad.

I wasn’t happy with mine. I will never be happy with mine. That one act might have robbed me of one of the greatest things a woman can do. I was without my child in my arms for a day, and then I could only hold her every once in awhile. I couldn’t take her home, I couldn’t nurse, I couldn’t do much else besides hold her hand and let her know her mom loved her.

I never want women to feel this way. Women should birth the way they want, and should have complete support in doing so.

I just want to say thank you for your comments and I am so sorry you felt you needed to delete them. Everyone is entitled to their opinion, and I do thank you for expressing yours.

Kayce

p.s. In case anyone is confused, here are her comments below… It’s my blog, I can put them on here.

Comment #1: I am going be the antagonistic here, I am not sure why your baby ended up bruised in the NICU, but to my knowledge Csections don’t cause bruising. I have had three sections and was happy, smiling, and holding my brand new baby within in minutes with 2 of the 3. The middle child was a preemie and in the NICU for other reasons. I have no pain from my incision and was walking within hours after my third. I am sorry your birth wasn’t what you had hoped it would be. I am all for a mother getting the birth she wants. I had birth plans for all of my csections and had a great surgeon/midwife team that supported me in those plans.
With my second child I briefly thought about VBAC and chose not to, thank God I did. My uterus nearly ruptured when I went into labor at 35 weeks. It was so thin they could see his face THROUGH the “window” in my uterus. I am aware that can happen to any pregnant woman, but I am happy I had the csection.
Woman should have the right to have a birth the way they want, but csections are NOT the end of the world.

Comment #2: I am assuming you are referring to my comment,since I was the only dissenting opinion. I really tried not to come off as rude. (maybe a little slow in the head with all the typos though oops). I just wanted to point out that not all C-sections are traumatic and and damaging to mother or baby. Whether someones section is medically needed isn’t for me to say since I am not a doctor.

It does irk me when people suggest that having a csection somehow robs a mother of “birthing”. I hate to think those thoughts would cause a mother to feel like a failure.

Sorry if I offended anyone. To the writer, I am especially sorry. You have every right to be upset with what happened and to fight for the birth you want.

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3 Responses

  1. I wonder why they were deleted. She apologized and said she didn't mean to come off as rude.

  2. While I think it's great the commenter did come back to apologize and better explain her stance, I did want to point out that c sections can and do cause bruising and other birth traumas such as the baby getting cut, increased risk of infection and increased risk of breathing problems. Anyone who has every seen a video of a cesarean performed knows that they are very rough on the baby and if there is any kind of malpositioning, such as the kind my own son had, it can be downright violent. I am glad for this commenter that she and her babies did not have to experience any birth trauma or injuries but MANY women and babies do and it is in fact unnecessary many times. As Kayce said, nature didn't screw up our bodies so much that one in three women require a cesarean.

  3. yoo. luv this post 🙂

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